Loan Me Your Sister

Items I loan you in exchange for Atkins Dieting Sister who loves bacon.

A puff of Commander Pascal’s secret stash  (Pascal may or may not be actual Commander)

Moscow Nights Album (#87 popular Billboard hit for May 1959)

Russian Artwork (real portrait of Russian Army)
You must provide picture of sexy, bacon-scented sister.
Then we deal.
Nicholai
album army atkins […]

Items I loan you in exchange for Fat Sister with neck that looks like pack of American hot dogs.

Ferry Automobile Moving (Nothing larger than Honda)

Russian Pimp Suit (smells of turnips and whores)

Hi-tech Meat Slicer (24X Speed)
You must provide picture of sexy, fat sister.
Then we deal.
Nicholai
automobile ferry Funny honda Humor Loan […]

Items I loan you in exchange for Big-Boned Sister with hips like feedbag.

1 Russian Snow Trike (runs on Vodka)

1 Velvet Painting of Mr. Yeltsin in bear suit. (original artist imprisoned)

1 Copy of “Russia’s Girls Gone Wild” (on VHS) *thank you EbaumsWorld
You must provide picture of sexy, Big-Boned sister eating American vegetable or other produce.
Then we […]